What Do You Give the Spoiled Rich White Lady Who Has Everything? Why, A Black Man Of Course!

I must start off by saying that I think the movie The Blind Side looks beyond terrible, which makes me completely biased in my review of anything relating to it.

The first time I saw the trailer I let out a gigantic laugh when I heard the lines

RANDOM LADY

"Hey, you're changin' that boy's life."

SANDRA BULLOCK

"No (dramatic pause), he's changin' mine."

I'm pretty sure I wasn't the only one in the theatre laughing. This film looks like a MOW at best. (My apologies to anyone who wants to go see it; I understand we all have soft spots and guilty pleasures) Since I didn't plan on seeing the movie (ever) its existence slipped from my thoughts.....

....That is, until I ran into this invite (shown on the left) in the LA Times today asking me to "Experience" The Blind Side" a full 3 days before it's officially released.

The first thing I noticed about this poster for The Blind Side (shown on the left) is that it reminds me a lot of the poster for the movie My Giant (shown below on the right).

Honestly, there's not much you can do when you want to show how truly massive someone is over someone else. Their plots aren't similar at all though...

However there is a plot that is sort of similar.

Is it just me, or does anyone else think that this movie The Blind Side sounds a lot like a grown-up drama version of The Toy? (if you're not familiar with that movie, you can watch the trailer here) I see it is "based on an extraordinary true story" but come on, who are you kidding.... What do you give the spoiled white lady who has everything? A black kid/man? Yeah... that'll teach 'em!

This has got to be one of the most un-extraordinary plot lines of the century. If you're interested in this sort of black society -vs- white society thing, I suggest you go watch Carl Reiner's The Jerk or Melvin Van Peeble's The Watermelon Man which I'm sure have more substance than this. (granted, I haven't seen The Blind Side, but do I really need to?)

Lastly, did anyone else notice the awful Photoshop job of Sandra Bullock's hand is on the poster? This can NOT be real. Just look at how unnatural it's bending and how it is oddly shaped. Did someone honestly pass this?

You know, if you're trying to sell a heartfelt moving drama, at least do a better job making it look like your "changed for the better" lead character actually cares about her newly "adopted" son. This looks like she's hired another arm to touch the boy with so she doesn't have to do it herself. (what a rich spoiled bitch! She didn't change at all -Ugh!)

Maybe I'm being too harsh on this movie.... (I have had a few drinks and I have no sensor "button" anymore) I guess we'll find out if the rest of America feels the same way next week when The Blind Side opens wide on November 20th.